i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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