I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
