dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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