also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
It was like getting head from an anaconda
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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