I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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