i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
