So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize