you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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