there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
