and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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