Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize