I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
