But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Randomize
