i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
You're like the curious george of whores
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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