I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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