I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
