And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
