Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
