Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
