Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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