I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
