I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
