I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
