just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
