He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Randomize
