i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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