So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
