I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
