Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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