She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
