you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
