ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
