so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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