you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Come on in and take your pants off
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