I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
