if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
