wrigley field is MILF paradise
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
