No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I need water and some morals
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
