And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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