That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
