So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
