she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
