Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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