Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
honey bunches of taint.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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