Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
