nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
