theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
