i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
