ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
