OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
