Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize
